Toward Attractive Communication

Colossians 4:6 Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone. (New Living Translation)

Be gracious in your speech. The goal is to bring out the best in others in a conversation, not put them down, not cut them out. (The Message)

Think back on the recent presidential debate. (I am sorry to make you relive that experience.) However, it illustrates this text with no embellishment at all. In the words of Forrest Gump, “That’s about all I have to say about that.”

A quick internet search will help you locate the 1984 presidential debates between Ronald Reagan and Walter Mondale. Feel free to watch those memories for the purposes of comparison and contrast.

Reagan was called The Great Communicator. At one point in one debate, he was so brilliant, so funny, even Vice President Mondale, his Democratic opponent, had to laugh and enjoy the moment. It is no wonder he won two landslide victories.

The positive alternative is a winning hand.

One of my favorite old sayings is, “When I’m abrasive, I’m never persuasive.” Another goes along with it. “Encouragement is oxygen to the soul.”

The “right response for everyone” is seldom, if ever, harsh, angry, curt, or vindictive. The right response makes people stand taller, understand easily, perform better, and feel valued.

The Message makes it clear: “The goal is to bring out the best in others in a conversation, not put them down, not cut them out.”

Here are three guidelines to work on today.

First, I will say nothing that does not bring out the best in others.

Second, I will only edify and encourage others with my words.

Third, I will speak in a manner that draws bigger circles of friendship, not smaller ones.

In this year when practically everything is going wrong, we can begin reversing the tide by the way we talk to ourselves, to those closest to us, to those we spend our days with, and to those we meet along the way.

Remember, the right response is always gracious and attractive. Take this life lesson from Paul the Apostle and not political candidates and news commentators.

The right words expressed with affection and gentleness make you more likable and lovable. They turn disagreements into searches for common ground. They replace grumpy frowns with grateful smiles.

I will make my conversation gracious and attractive.

Our Father, restrict my vocabulary to those words which are gracious and attractive. Root out sarcasm. Eliminate hate. Deliver me from a sharp tongue and cutting remarks. Empower me to edify and encourage. When I cannot speak a kind word, remind me not to speak at all. Amen.